


Friendships of Convenience

by perniciousLizard



Series: Fired Up and Bone Weary [8]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Background Sans/Grillby, Gen, M/M, Post-Pacifist Route, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-15
Updated: 2016-03-15
Packaged: 2018-05-26 19:55:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6253804
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/perniciousLizard/pseuds/perniciousLizard
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Papyrus and Grillby don’t even really like each other, but they both know that it would be easier for them if they were friends, now that Grillby is dating Sans.  </p>
<p>This is a side story that takes place over the course of the previous stories in this series.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Friendships of Convenience

Grillby’s phone rang, so he stepped away from the crowded bar and pulled it out of his apron pocket.  He didn’t recognize the number.  

“…hello?”

“HELLO! THIS IS PAPYRUS!!  IS THIS GRILLBY’S?”

“…yes? I don’t take orders.”

“WHAT WAS THAT?”

Grillby wasn’t sure why he bothered answering the phone.

“IS MY BROTHER THERE?  YOU PROBABLY REMEMBER ME, FROM EARLIER.  HE LOOKS A LITTLE LIKE ME, AN INCREDIBLY HANDSOME SKELETON, BUT HE IS MUCH SHORTER AND IS POSSIBLY EMITTING SLIME.”  

Sans was sitting a few feet away, chatting with one of the regulars.  Grillby didn’t see any slime, but he _was_ a very short skeleton.  

Grillby walked over to him and got to hear the punch line of a terrible joke.  It was going to bug him all night, wondering what the start of it was.  

“…your brother is looking for you,” Grillby said.  He held up his phone.

Red Bird said, “Grillbz says there’s a call for you.”  

Sans read the number.  "oh hey."  He got out his own phone.  "welp, didn’t hear those calls.”  

“…it’s loud, tonight,” Grillby said.

“Grillbz says it’s a wonder anyone can hear anything in here.”  

Sans looked at Grillby, a little suspicious, like he wasn’t quite sure that was what he actually said.  "yeah i mean half of us don’t even have ears.“  

 

–-

 

_THIS IS PAPYRUS!  I KNOW YOU REMEMBER ME!  IS MY BROTHER THERE, AGAIN?_

Grillby wanted to ignore the message.  He didn’t want to act as a go-between whenever Sans wasn’t answering his phone.  

He put away his cell and left the kitchen carrying a large platter of various fried appetizers.  He spotted Sans in what seemed like his favorite seat.  He looked like he had nodded off.  

Once everyone had their food, he took his phone out again.  

_Yes.  He fell asleep._

_OF COURSE HE DID!_

A few minutes later, the door swung open and Papyrus marched in.  Sans didn’t wake up until he poked him in the arm bone a few times.

"oh. hey, bro.”

“YOU ARE NOT ON BREAK FOR ANOTHER TWENTY MINUTES!”

Papyrus stuck around long enough to let Sans finish his fries.  He ordered a glass of milk, because it was “MADE WITH STRONG BONES.”  

 

–-

 

_Papyrus, this is Grillby._

_OF COURSE!  I HAVE YOUR NUMBER IN MY CONTACTS.  DON’T TELL ME THAT MY LAZYBONES OF A BROTHER IS THERE._

_UNLESS HE IS ACTUALLY THERE?   THEN YOU SHOULD TELL ME._

_I think you should come pick him up._

One too many glasses could put even a cheerful monster like Sans in a dark mood.  His jokes had gotten increasingly morbid, all night, until he stopped talking.  Grillby had thought he had nodded off, for a while, but he was just sitting there, quiet.  

Sans looked up once and the light in his eye sockets was completely missing.  For a second, it was like there wasn’t a person inside his skull.  

Grillby checked his phone again, surprised he hadn’t gotten a faster response.  He started to type out an explanation for his request, and the door burst open.  

Papyrus took one look at his brother and stopped.  

Sans must have heard him come in, because he looked up from his plate and rubbed his head.  "oh.  hey, bro.“  The light was back, and he looked almost back to normal.  Like his brother coming in had flipped a switch on inside him.  "get a burg craving?”

“I WILL NEVER GET A CRAVING FOR ANY OF THE GREASY FOOD HERE,” Papyrus said.  He sat down in the empty stool next to his brother.  

Grillby went to grab some milk.  

 

–-

 

If Grillby were to scroll back up through his messages to Papyrus, they would just be an endless series of messages about Sans.  Was his brother there?  Would you come pick up your brother?  

They reached the surface, and even those messages slowed down.  Sans seemed more alert; more likely to wake up when his phone went off and answer it himself.  He didn’t spend as many late nights drinking until he looked sober.  

By the time he and Sans started dating, it had been months since his last message from Papyrus.  Grillby didn’t speak with him at all until Sans disappeared for several days and didn’t respond to Grillby’s messages.  

He had no idea at the time, but messaging Papyrus out of the blue to ask if his brother was all right would permanently wedge open a text message floodgate.  

 

–-

 

_MY BROTHER IS IMPROVING, SO YOU DON’T HAVE TO WORRY!  HE WAS OUT OF BED FOR SEVERAL HOURS, AND EVEN THOUGH HE SPENT THEM SITTING IN OTHER PLACES IN THE HOUSE, IT IS A VERY GOOD SIGN!_

_Thank you, Papyrus.  Let me know if there is anything I can do._

_EVERYTHING IS TAKEN CARE OF, BUT I AM SURE HE WOULD LOVE A CALL FROM HIS *VERY GOOD FRIEND*_

This was followed immediately by another message that was entirely winking emojis.  Grillby couldn’t look at it for longer than two seconds without getting embarrassed.  

_I will make sure to do that._

–-

 

_SINCE YOU AND MY BROTHER ARE NOW SUCH *GOOD FRIENDS* I WAS THINKING THAT WE SHOULD ALSO BE GOOD FRIENDS!  EXCEPT OBVIOUSLY WITHOUT THE ASTERISKS!  STANDARD, PLATONIC, GOOD FRIENDS!_

Grillby stared at the message for a while, not entirely sure how to respond to it.  He wasn’t sure they actually could be “good friends,” but it might make things a little easier.  He didn’t _dislike_ Papyrus, even if he was never going to appreciate his opinion about how greasy Grillby’s food was (and how that was somehow a negative thing).  

_I don’t mind._

_AND THE ALREADY POPULAR PAPYRUS EASILY GAINS ANOTHER COOL FRIEND!  HERE IS A_ _LINK_ _TO MY “BLOG.”_

_–-_

 

_MY BROTHER HAS IMPROVED SO MUCH, HE SOMEHOW MANAGED TO PRODUCE A BAG OF GREASY CHIPS OUT OF NOWHERE.  SO HIS APPETITE AND DEVIOUS PERSONALITY HAVE BOTH RETURNED._

_He must have just had them around._

_CHIPS, A BOYFRIEND…WHAT ELSE IS HE KEEPING FROM ME??_

_We had only been on one date.  I’m sure he would have told you eventually._

_NEVER MIND!  I NEED TO GO MAKE SURE HE HASN’T HIDDEN ANY HUMAN FOOD IN THE CRAWL SPACE OR UNDER THE COUCH.  DID YOU KNOW THAT HUMAN FOOD STARTS TO SMELL BAD IF YOU DON’T KEEP IT COLD?  IT’S SO STRANGE!  NO WONDER HUMANS ARE SO DIFFICULT TO UNDERSTAND._

 

_–-_

 

The first time Sans made it back to the bar after his illness, Papyrus checked in on him.  

_DON’T LET SANS PRETEND TO BE WELL ENOUGH TO STAY OUT ALL NIGHT!_

_He’s heading back now._

_FINALLY!_

_You are a very good brother, Papyrus._

_I KNOW!!_

After a few minutes, Grillby received one more message:   _BUT THANK YOU FOR_ _ACKNOWLEDGING IT!_

 

–-

 

_IF I ASK YOU A QUESTION, DO YOU PROMISE TO NOT TELL MY BROTHER?_

_That depends, Papyrus._

_I KNOW YOU ARE PROBABLY LOYAL IN AN APPROPRIATELY *ROMANTIC* FASHION, BUT IT’S IMPORTANT HE NOT FIND OUT I ASKED!_

_I am not sure I can promise with no context like this.  But I won’t tell him without a very good reason._

_FINE!  IS HE THERE, NOW?_

_Yes._

_HOW TIRED DOES HE LOOK TO YOU?_

_He looks tired._

_OKAY BUT ON A SCALE FROM -12 TO 12, HOW TIRED?_

_Is this a normal scale, or his scale?  8 for a regular person, 0 for him._

_HOW DID HE LOOK WHEN HE CAME IN?_

_I don’t know, 5?  I am not sure why you picked those numbers._

_IS THAT HIS SCALE, OR THE REGULAR SCALE?_

_His._

_OK!  THANK YOU, GRILLBY._

_I don’t think your brother will be upset that you’re concerned about him._

_NO, HE WILL, BECAUSE I TOLD HIM THAT HE LOOKED SO WELL I DID NOT NEED TO CHECK UP ON HIM ANYMORE.  IF HE FINDS OUT I AM DOING IT ANYWAY, IT COULD HURT HIS CONFIDENCE IN HIS RECOVERY!  PAPYRUS ALWAYS KEEPS EVERY EVENTUALITY IN MIND._

_I won’t tell him you asked me anything._

Papyrus sent him a text that was, _yet again_ , just winking emojis.  

“that my bro?” Sans asked.  

“……….no,” Grillby said.  "My niece.“  

"she askin about me?  you keep looking over here.”  

“…yes.”  He put away his phone and went back to wiping glasses.  "…she asked me to rate your attractiveness."  

"hot or not?”

“….on a scale.  I told her she is supposed to be doing her homework.”

“you gave her a number, though, right grillbz?”  

“…yes.”

“yeah?”

“…yes.”

“not gonna tell me, are you?”

“…no.”

 

–-

 

_I HAVE A QUESTION!_

_Your brother is not here right now._

_NO, I KNOW!  HE IS ON THE COUCH, PLAYING A VIDEO GAME WITH THE HUMAN, FRISK.  OH NO, DO I REALLY ONLY MESSAGE YOU ABOUT MY BROTHER?_

_Yes._

_WE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE BECOMING CLOSE FRIENDS OUTSIDE YOUR DEEPENING RELATIONSHIP WITH MY BROTHER!  I TOOK THAT ON AS A RESPONSIBILITY, BUT I HAVE BEEN FAILING TO UPHOLD MY END OF THE FRIENDSHIP!_

_This is about something other than your brother, this time, right?_

_RIGHT!  THAT IS COMPLETELY TRUE!  GRILLBY, HAVE YOU EVER BAKED A CAKE?  IT IS A LITTLE BIT LIKE A MUFFIN, EXCEPT SWEETER AND LARGER?_

_I have baked innumerable cakes._

_SO, YES?  DOES THAT MEAN YOU ARE TIRED OF THEM?_

_What did you need to ask?_

_I DON’T *NEED* TO ASK ANYTHING!  BUT, IF I DID WANT CONFIRMATION ON SOMETHING…WHAT TEMPERATURE WOULD YOU BAKE IT AT?_

_You are using a recipe, right?  It depends on what kind of cake you’re making and what size pan you are making it in._

_I AM MAKING THE BEST KIND, WHICHEVER ONE THAT IS._

Grillby was answering messages all morning, until he had to tell Papyrus that he was opening the restaurant and couldn’t talk anymore.  A few hours later, he received a cell phone photo of a cake.  The little human was sitting behind it, and it read “HAPPY BIRTHDAY, COOL FRIEND” in what Grillby hoped was red decorative icing, and not sauce. Papyrus had also written “MADE BY PAPYRUS” in cursive around the side of the cake.  

 

–-

 

_I KNOW YOU ARE ALWAYS BUSY, BUT IF YOU ARE SLIGHTLY LESS BUSY THAN USUAL, I HAVE ANOTHER IMPORTANT COOKING QUESTION!  I ASKED UNDYNE, BUT SHE SAID SHE HAD NO IDEA AND THAT I SHOULD JUST “WING IT,” BUT THAT JUST MADE A MESS.  THAT I THEN HAD TO CLEAN UP._

_I have a minute, Papyrus._

He actually would have taken a quick break to give Papyrus advice on cooking, if he had been busy.  He thought of it as doing a service to all the rest of Papyrus’ friends.  

_SO, MARINARA SAUCE IS OBVIOUSLY THE HEIGHT OF PERFECTION, AS FAR AS SAUCES GO, BUT I AM COOKING FOR SOMEONE WHO TOLD ME THEY DISLIKE TOMATOES?  AND PAPYRUS IS NOT THE KIND OF FRIEND WHO WOULD SERVE SOMETHING FOR A FRIEND THAT THEY WON’T LIKE!_

_SO I HEARD ABOUT THIS SAUCE CALLED “ALFREDO” WHICH IS NAMED AFTER THE ELITE ITALIAN CHEF WHO INVENTED IT AND IS ONLY A FEW LETTERS AWAY FROM HAVING THE WORD FRIEND IN IT!_

_I know it.  Give me a minute to type, and I will explain how to make it._

_I THANK YOU ON BEHALF OF MY STRANGE TOMATO HATING FRIEND!_

 

_–-_

 

_I HOPE YOU HAD A VERY NICE DATE!_

_It was fine.  I overslept and I am a little too busy to talk, though, Papyrus._

_IS MY BROTHER BEING A BAD INFLUENCE ON YOU??  DON’T LET HIS LAZINESS INFECT YOU!_

Grillby replied a few hours later, once he was back on schedule.  

_Your brother would not want me to start acting like him, since he likes my food so much._

_HE DOES LOVE GREASE, FOR SOME REASON._

Grillby glared at his phone and then shoved it in his pocket.  He had too much work to deal with this.  When he checked it again, he had another new message.  

_WAS THE DATE ENTIRELY NICE?   SANS WAS "CAGEY" ABOUT ANSWERING WHEN I ASKED HOW IT WENT.  AT FIRST HE MADE A TERRIBLE JOKE, BUT THEN LATER ON WHEN I ASKED AGAIN HE SAID “the date was fine” BUT I AM NOT SURE HE WAS ENTIRELY HONEST, FROM HOW HE SAID IT.  DID YOU HAVE AN ARGUMENT?  IF YOU TELL ME WHAT IT WAS ABOUT, OF COURSE I WILL GO ALL OUT TO HELP YOU PATCH THINGS UP!_

_We didn’t have a fight.  The date itself was fine.  There was a human there who was rude and almost ruined things._

_HE DIDN’T MENTION THAT AT ALL!  SOMETIMES HUMANS CAN BE VERY RUDE AND CULTURALLY INSENSITIVE, BUT ONCE THEY SEE WHAT WE’RE LIKE AND HOW GREAT MONSTERS REALLY ARE, THEY WILL ALL COME AROUND._

_I think I really appreciate your optimism, Papyrus._

_IF WE DON’T THINK THINGS CAN GET BETTER, GOING FORWARD, THEN IT MAKES IT HARD TO DO ANYTHING.  ESPECIALLY WHEN THINGS HAVE BEEN VERY BAD VERY RECENTLY._

_WHEN YOU SAY, “rude,” WHAT EXACTLY DO YOU MEAN?_

_I think that if Sans didn’t mention it at all, I probably shouldn’t be more specific._

_BUT IF WE ARE FRIENDS, THEN WE CAN TALK ABOUT IT EVEN IF MY BROTHER IS BEING HIMSELF.  HE JUST LIKES TO BE MYSTERIOUS ABOUT EVERYTHING._

This confirmed a suspicion Grillby had, from the beginning, about why Papyrus wanted to be friends with him.  It was all just still to keep an eye on his brother.  Sans acted the same way, sneaking around to check out the new friends Papyrus made.  It was strange, to Grillby, how they could be so close but hide so much.  

Grillby kept things from his family, but he was not anywhere near as close to them as Papyrus and Sans were to each other.  

_He doesn’t want you to worry._

_IS THERE A REASON I SHOULD BE WORRIED???_

Oops.

_No.  It turned out fine.  I just don’t want to think about it anymore._

_WELL, I HOPE THAT HUMAN LEARNED A VALUABLE LESSON!_

_I hope so, too._

He doubted it, but Papyrus was so optimistic, he couldn’t help but feel that little bit of hope.  

 

_–-_

 

_Papyrus, do you mind if I ask you a question?_

_OF COURSE NOT!  MY ALFREDO SAUCE WOULD HAVE BEEN A MESS IF YOU HADN’T ANSWERED MY QUESTIONS!  SO IT BECAME AN “ALL FRIENDO” SAUCE!  NYEHEHEH!_

Papyrus seemed to be in a good mood.  

_Could you tell me when your brother’s birthday is?  I should know, by this point, but I don’t._

_OF COURSE YOU SHOULD KNOW BY NOW, AND OF COURSE YOU DON’T.  BECAUSE MY BROTHER IS MYSTERIOUS ABOUT EVERYTHING, EVEN THINGS THAT THERE IS NO POINT IN BEING MYSTERIOUS ABOUT.  SOMETIMES IT SEEMS LIKE THE ONLY THING IS WILLING TO WORK AT!_

_So you will tell me?_

_THE GREAT PAPYRUS IS HERE TO HELP!_

 

_–-_

 

_SANS SAID YOU WERE FEELING VERY BAD, BUT HE SAID VERY LITTLE ELSE.  HOW ARE YOU DOING?  IF YOU NEED ANYTHING, PAPYRUS WILL BE HERE TO PROVIDE FOR YOU.  MY BROTHER MAY WANT TO HELP BUT HE IS ALSO VERY LAZY, SO IF YOU NEED SOMETHING DONE RIGHT, YOU CAN ASK ME!_

 

_–-_

 

_I KNOW YOU ARE PROBABLY RESTING, AS YOU SHOULD BE DOING, BUT NOT GETTING AN ANSWER IS STILL MAKING YOUR COOLEST FRIEND WORRY FOR YOU!  SEND A MESSAGE IMMEDIATELY WHEN YOU WAKE UP!_

 

_–-_

 

_SANS IS PRETENDING NOT TO BE CONCERNED, BUT HE REALLY IS.  HE IS PRETENDING TO SEND MESSAGES TO OTHER PEOPLE AND CHECK THE TIME, BUT HE IS REALLY LOOKING TO SEE IF YOU HAVE SENT HIM AN UPDATE YET!_

 

_–-_

 

_PLEASE, IF YOU HAVE EVEN A SECOND, SEND SOMETHING TO MY BROTHER._

_Papyru just saw your messages im not waering my glases but im fine_

_DID YOU TALK TO MY BROTHER??_

_Not yet_

_WELL, HE IS WAITING FOR YOU TO TELL HIM YOU’RE OKAY SO STOP TALKING TO ME!_

_Ok_

_BUT IT IS GOOD TO HEAR THAT YOU ARE DOING BETTER!  YOU SHOULD DEFINITELY CONTINUE THAT!_

Grillby’s mother found his glasses for him, eventually.  He wasn’t sure why he thought putting them under the bed was the best idea.  

 

–-

 

_Thank you for the card and the cake._

Grillby sighed, and typed in one more message.

_And also the containers of pasta._

_YOU ARE VERY WELCOME!  YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE TO COOK FOR YOURSELF YET, JUST BECAUSE YOUR MOTHER HAS LEFT AND SANS IS TOO LAZY TO DO THINGS LIKE THAT._

_I miss cooking for myself, but I appreciate the sentiment._

_YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO GIVE PEOPLE FOOD WHEN THEY ARE ILL, AND THE SICKER THEY ARE, THE MORE FOOD YOU GIVE THEM.  THAT IS HOW THEY KNOW THAT YOU CARE ABOUT THEIR WELL-BEING!  IS THAT THE “SENTIMENT” THAT YOU “APPRECIATE?”_

_Yes. Thank you._

_IF THERE IS SOME KIND OF CULTURAL DIFFERENCE AND YOU WOULD UNDERSTAND BETTER WITH SOMETHING ELSE, YOU NEED TO TELL ME!  IT IS IMPORTANT THAT YOU UNDERSTAND!_

_I thought I understood, but now I think I’m missing something._

_YOU HAVE NO INTENTION OF EATING WHAT I MADE FOR YOU!_

_Papyrus, I can’t eat an entire cake by myself.  I appreciate it.  I am not lying._

Grillby realized he was more than a little irritated.  He wasn’t in the best mood, to start with, still too weak to open his bar but too well to not want to be down there.  

_If you were sick and I sent you hamburgers, would you eat them?  No!  You would complain about them being greasy and then thank me for the gesture.  You probably wouldn’t even bother to not complain about it where I couldn’t hear you._

He regretted sending that message immediately, but there was no getting it back.  

Papyrus had sent him a gift.  Grillby knew that he was supposed to lie and say he was going to use it.

His phone started to ring, and he found himself immediately annoyed again.  He rejected the call.

_Papyrus, you can’t understand a word I say over the phone._

_CAN I COME OVER, THEN?  I NEED TO TALK ABOUT SOMETHING, AND I AM HAVING TROUBLE WRITING WHAT I WANT TO SAY!_

_BUT YOU’RE TIRED AND STILL SICK, SO NEVER MIND?_

_If you want to come over, go ahead._

Were they having a serious argument?  He went over to his kitchen, trying to sort out his thoughts before Papyrus showed up.  He wanted to blame his illness for being snippy and rude, but regardless, he would have to apologize.  

He put the pasta in his refrigerator and left out the card and cake. Considering, he got some dishes and set the table.  He put the cake in the middle of the table and folded up the blanket he had on the couch.  

He had just finished putting away his vacuum and was feeling embarrassingly worn out from the exertion when a loud rapping on the door let him know Papyrus had arrived.  

His hands flickered uneasily on the doorknob.  He shook his head.  

_Not like it matters what Papyrus thinks of me._

But his hand was betraying him.  

_You’re lying to yourself.  It’s when you lie to yourself that your behavior is unpredictable and dangerous.  Of course you care what he thinks of you, and it can’t just be because he’s Sans’ brother.  You wouldn’t have gotten so annoyed if you didn’t care.  Obviously._

He opened the door, and behind it Papyrus was wringing his hands.  His finger bones made quiet knocking noises as they hit each other.  

“……hello, Papyrus.”  

“GRILLBY!” He reached out and grabbed Grillby’s hands, startling him.  "I MUST OFFER MY MOST SINCERE APOLOGIES!“

"…what?"

"I HAD NO IDEA MY COMMENTS WERE UPSETTING YOU!  NO WONDER YOU REFUSE TO EAT MY COOKING!”  

“…” Grillby had no idea how to even start.  "…why don’t you come in," he said.  He stepped aside so Papyrus could walk past him.

"OH NO!  YOU EVEN PUT OUT THE CAKE SO WE COULD SHARE IT, TOGETHER, AS FRIENDS.  I, PAPYRUS, HAVE BEEN THE WORST OF THE WORST.”  

Grillby shook his head.  "…I…I am not sure how to put this." He gestured at one of the places at his table and Papyrus sat down.  

Papyrus still looked uneasy.  

Grillby cut him a piece of cake, thinking.  "…I’m not angry.  And……"  He kept expecting Papyrus to interrupt him, but he was waiting, watching him cut himself a small slice of cake and sit in the seat across from him.  "…I should be the one apologizing."

"YOU?  THAT IS RIDICULOUS!  SURELY YOU ARE JESTING, BECAUSE IT WAS, I, PAPYRUS WHO WAS HURTING YOUR FEELINGS FOR…YEARS!  WITHOUT REALIZING!”

“…without realizing.  If I had been taking our friendship seriously, I would have mentioned it.”  He took a very small bite of the cake.  It wasn’t amazing, but it showed a marked improvement.  

Papyrus looked stricken.  "YOU WERE PRETENDING TO BE FRIENDS WITH ME?"

He shook his head, vehement.  "No.”  Papyrus was too deeply sincere.  He was like a pile of dry kindling waiting for a stray spark to fly off and burn him to nothing.  But he had to risk hurting him if he was going to clarify anything.  "…I saw it as very casual.  Convenient, because of Sans……I assumed you saw it the same way."  

Papyrus’ face was a cornucopia of emotion, and it was almost difficult to look at him.  "WELL.  THAT’S ALL RIGHT!  YOU’RE BEING…VERY CLEAR, NOW.”  

“…I should have known better, Papyrus.  You’re much more honest a skeleton than…”

Papyrus looked away, for a second, down at his plate.  "NO?  MAYBE NOT?  I JUST REALIZED THAT, AFTER ALL THIS TIME, I HAVE NOT ASKED YOU TO JUST ‘HANG OUT’ A SINGLE TIME!  NO WONDER YOU NEVER TOOK MY FRIENDSHIP SERIOUSLY.  I HAVE NOT BEEN TAKING IT SERIOUSLY, EITHER!  TAKING ADVANTAGE OF YOU DATING MY BROTHER TO KEEP AN EYE ON HIM, BUT NEVER SHOWING YOU THE TRUE NATURE OF MY FEELINGS OF PLATONIC FRIENDSHIP FOR YOU."

"…yes. It’s the same, for me.“  

"I, PAPYRUS THE GREAT, CANNOT LET THIS MISTAKE STAND WITHOUT IMMEDIATE CORRECTION!”  He stood up so fast he knocked his chair back onto the floor.  He didn’t seem to notice.  He marched around the table and grabbed Grillby’s hand.  "I AM STILL VERY SORRY THAT I INSULTED YOUR COOKING!

“I NEED MY BROTHER TO UNDERSTAND THAT I DON’T APPROVE OF HIS EATING HABITS, AND I DID NOT THINK THAT YOU MINDED AT ALL!  SANS’ HEALTH CAN BE…POOR AND HE NEVER SHOWS ANY INTEREST IN IMPROVING IT.  

"BUT! I’M SURE YOUR COOKING IS DELICIOUS OR NO ONE WOULD PAY TO EAT YOUR FOOD.  MY PERSONAL DISGUST AND THE SHOWER I HAVE TO TAKE WHENEVER I PICK MY BROTHER UP, THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOUR SKILL AS A CHEF!”

Grillby rubbed under his glasses, with the hand Papyrus wasn’t passionately clinging to.  That was going to be as good an apology as he was going to get, he supposed.  He went to say something, but Papyrus was on a roll.  

“MAYBE I AM EVEN A LITTLE ENVIOUS THAT EVERYONE SEEMS SO MUCH MORE EXCITED TO EAT YOUR FOOD THAN MINE, BUT NEVER MIND.  GRILLBY.”  He clasped Grillby’s hand even harder.  "I HAVE DEEP FEELINGS OF FRIENDSHIP FOR YOU, AND NOT ENTIRELY BECAUSE THEY ARE CONVENIENT BECAUSE OF MY BROTHER.  I APPRECIATE THE PASSION YOU HAVE FOR COOKING!  I LIKE THAT YOU ARE CLEARLY WILLING AND CAPABLE OF VACUUMING!  I LIKE THAT YOU ARE GENTLE WITH MY BROTHER AND DIDN’T MIND HELPING ME TO LEARN HOW TO MAKE MY FRIEND SAUCE!  I ALSO LIKE THAT YOU ARE SUCH A BRIGHT SHADE OF ORANGE!  

“GRILLBY! WOULD YOU LIKE TO HANG OUT WITH ME?”  

“…yes?”

“…DO YOU REALLY WANT TO?”

“…I think I’m overwhelmed.”

“NATURALLY! BUT,” he said, almost stopping, doubt written on his face, “IN A GOOD WAY, OR A BAD WAY?”

“………in a way that makes it difficult to……speak in a way you understand.”

“OH.”  He looked Grillby over.  "YOU SEEM VERY TIRED.“

That was what everyone kept telling him.  

"I WILL SIT DOWN AND EAT MY CAKE, AND GIVE YOU A MINUTE TO RETURN TO BEING WHELMED.”  

Grillby nodded, embarrassed.  Papyrus went back to his side of the table, righted his chair, and finished eating his piece of the “Get Well Soon!” cake.  

“…we should hang out,” Grillby decided.  It was probably going to involve the information HUD.  It had been years since he remembered using it, last, but Papyrus would probably insist.  "…I do want to be friends with you."

"REALLY?”

Grillby nodded.  He took another small bite of the cake.  


End file.
